And here I sit, discouraged and beaten, in a dark hole called failure. Four short weeks ago, Mr. Thursday Night and I began a battle of will and intellect, pride and pocket book. Fresh off an impressive three week stretch, I assumed the competition would be no more than a memorialization of my successful endeavour into the handicapping realm and a way to make a few extra dollars. But a recent run has left me 11-14 and looking for answers. A man is nothing without his principles. So it's time to return to my principles and start picking games, once again, as a contrarian.
With that introduction, I give you the following winners (home teams in all caps and public betting statistics courtesy of www.pre-game.com):
1. DUKE +1 vs Virginia: The much improved Cavaliers are fresh off a 24-19 drubbing of the Miami Hurricanes. Virginia, which also took USC down to the wire earlier this season, is led by defensive guru Mike London. Duke, on the other hand, has struggled all season long, especially on the defensive side of the ball where it has given up 44 points to Virginia Tech, 62 points to Alabama, and 54 points to Wake Forest (WAKE FREAKIN' FOREST!). General consensus and 90% of the wagering public agree that UVA will roll. But not ol' LPL, WE'RE TAKING THE BLUE DEVILS +1.
2. Louisville +6 vs SYRACUSE: Under new coach Dough Marrone, Syracuse has become a Big East power notching impressive wins over South Florida, West Virginia, and Cincinnati. Louisville, on the other hand, has been a mild disappointment this season. Last week, not only did they get steamrolled by flying mustaches of Pittsburgh, the Cardinals also lost running back Bilal Powell. With Victor Anderson sucking wind in the trainers office, Louisville will be forced to turn to redshirt freshman Jeremy Wright to carry the ball. General consensus and 80% of the wagering public agree that this one won't be pretty and is all over Syracuse. MORONS, ALL OF THEM, GIVE ME THE CARDINALS +6.
3. TULANE +10 vs Southern Miss: A traditional Conference USA power, Southern Miss looks to become bowl eligible for the 8th straight season. The Golden Eagle high powered office has put up 43, 41, and 49 points in its last three outings. The Green wave, on the other hand, prefers to giving up lots of points rather than scoring them, as they have surrendered 52 to Tulsa, 41 to Army, and 42 to Houston. 88% of the betting public agrees that Southern Miss will be taking Tulane behind the shed....HOWEVER, WE'RE LOADING UP ON TULANE +10. SHAUN KING! TOMMY BOWDEN! BOURBON STREET!
4. KANSAS ST. +4 vs. Texas: Although Texas has hit a few rough patches this season, the Longhorns have put together impressive wins over Nebraska and Texas Tech and took Oklahoma down to the wire. Kansas St., on the other hand, got blown at by 35 by Nebraska, gave up 47 points to freakin' Baylor, and has lost three out of its last four. 76% of the voting public and Tim Riggins agree that you don't eff with the Longhorns. I'M GOING WITH THE WILDCATS +4. WAKE UP AGGIEVILLE! SHOTS OF JACK D ON ME!
5. UCLA +5 vs. Oregon St.: Oregon St. has been impressive in Pac 10 play with wins against Arizona St, California, and Arizona. The Bruins, on the other hand, lost 0-35 to Stanford, 7-35 to California, and were absolutely embarrassed by Oregon 13-60. No reason you shouldn't join 92% of the betting public and take Oregon St. I'M ROLLING WITH THE BRUINS +5. WAKE UP BOB TOLEDO, THIS IS GOING TO BE AN OFFENSIVE EXPLOSION.
Until next week, LPL.
